Sunday, April 11, 2010

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helooo..
just come back from a long break...
actually, i dont have any idea what to share.. my mind didnt work well and my emotion were so unstable.
oh gosh, please get away from me!!!

lately, i thought i had the worst week in 2010, so far. i just could not tell others what i was feeling about my surrounding. either it made me happy, sad, unconfertable, etc.. i didnt know... EMPTY. thats all i felt..
if you ask me, were you happy? seems to be yes, but inside me, its gonna say NO!! but again, when you ask: whats goin on? i couldnt explain, even answer it.. i have NO IDEA at all..

i have been trying to talk to someone, try to share my thoughts, but it didnt work..even to my closest friends, i could not speak.. i know i have someting in my mind that should be taken out.. whats that? i miss my old me..
me!!

my friends have tried so hard to make me happy. in fact, they were so worry whether did they do something wrong to me or not.. i got laughter in minutes, and a sudden drop in my emotion: quiet.. i dont know why!!
am i person who will keep my anger inside my heart? or will i show it to you?
am i person who will say that i dont like you because bla bla bla? or will i stay quiet and say nothing?
do you think i could express my emotion? or do i just keep it?
oh gosh.. i need a answer..

recently, i wanted so bad to say bad words.. when i felt angry to someone, when i felt unconfortable with them.. i just wanted to shout in front of them.. say those rant.. yes! i wanted it so bad.. so so bad..

i wish my friends would understand me more and more. imma try to do the same way for you guys..
i dont want to disappoint you all. at this time, you are the most precious things for me.
sorry for my current condition.
:(
<3 <3

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